Tale of Growth & Celebration!

Yes, I know... it's been a while since you've heard from me. I've been going through it with my hair. To date it's been 10 months since I big chopped. However, at my 6 month anniversary I had begun to think about what to do with my hair since I knew that I had some length. I wanted to do a length check, touch up my color, straighten my hair and clip the ends. I discussed with other natural divas, looked through hair magazines, and made an hair appointment with my hair dresser. But, I still felt uncertain. Then I saw a picture of Frenchie Davis...

Damn you Frenchie!!! Some of you may know Frenchie Davis from Fox's American Idol or NBC's The Voice. She is a curvaceous plus size woman like myself with a beautiful face and Caesar haircut. For those of you who are not familiar, a Caesar is a very low hair cut. She is practically bald. Frenchie is definitely sassy, strong, confident and beautiful. I see her and think "I don't need hair. I can definitely rock that!". I spent three weeks debating and discussing this hair option with my closest friends. They all looked at me like I was crazy however, they all eventually came around and said if anyone could pull it off it off it was definitely me. But even still I continued to give it some thought. After all getting a Caesar is a BIG change.

Due to my own uncertainty it took me 8 weeks, yes... 2 months to actually go to my hair stylist to have whatever done. I woke up that morning still undecided thinking "Do I cut it all off or just color it, straighten it and clip the ends?" I had so much anxiety that I was 45 minutes early for my appointment so that I could look at more hair magazines while I waited. Let me just say that my GOD is awesome. When I walked into the salon there sat Momma Charmaine. Momma Charmaine is the mother of one of my very close friends that I went to high school with. She had just come from under the dryer and was waiting for her turn in my stylist chair. I immediately confided in her telling her how undecided I was. She said "Nicole, just straighten it and clip the ends. If after 2 weeks you don't like it cut it all off. That way you'll never wonder what it looked like after growing it out all this time." Is that what it took? Someone to break something so simple down for me? So of course that's what I did. Needless to say that I still have all of my hair on my head.

It’s hard to believe that I will be 1 year natural in two months.  Trust me, I have my good days and my bad days.  All and all I am enjoying this journey!  Thanks for reading The Tales of a Diva one Natural – The Good, The Bad, and the oh so Fabulous!  Until we meet again…

Stay Beautiful!

-Nic

GUEST DIVA: Diva Martine's Tale of No Natural Curls

Hi There!
I love bringing you blog posts that speak to the good, the bad, and the fabulous aspects of being natural.  With any type of hair whether it's relaxed or natural we as women get bored, frustrated, and crave for something new or something that our hair is lacking may it be shine, brightness, or in this case curls.  Diva Martine is with us again to share another Tale. Enjoy! - Diva Nic

Diva Martine's Tale of No Natural Curls by Diva Martine

I've experienced a renewed sense of freedom as I chopped of my relaxed locks but it didn’t last for long. I didn’t have a real plan on what I would do next or how to style my hair until I watched a few YouTube videos. There were endless videos on how to bring out your curls. For the next couple of weeks I went on a mission to bring out my curls only to suffer disappointment when my hair refused to curl. Maybe it was due to my poor job of cutting my own hair. I would never advise this to anyone but I asked my boyfriend to clip my ends. The only problem with this idea was that he wasn’t a barber. Finally I stepped into a barber shop and had them shave my head down---I had nothing to lose at this point. I walked out of that barber shop feeling rather sexy and stylish. I never knew that I had such a cute shaped head and unbeknownst to me, I could carry the almost-bald look rather well. It was probably the first time in my life that I had strong/beautiful black men stop me on the street to tell me that I looked beautiful. I think that it was a combination of my hairstyle and the confidence that is required to rock a fade.

It was only a few months into my new look that I began to obsess about my curls, or lack thereof, once again. I became a product junky, purchasing gels and conditioners from every retailer imaginable because I was confident that one of them had the secret potion to bringing out my curls. I suffered from curl envy as I watched other naturals in the street. “What’s wrong with my hair? Why won’t it curl?” I couldn’t believe that I was back in the mental oppressive state that I had been before my big chop. The whole point of going natural was to free myself form social constructs of beauty and now here I was wishing that my 4C hair was a different grade. Hadn’t this always been my issue; not feeling like I was good enough? It was time for me to drop my story.

Maybe my hair just didn’t curl, which didn’t make me any less valuable than my friends with natural curls. The whole point of being natural was to let my tresses be free to do as they pleased. By coating every strand of my hair with mounds of gel, in order to create curls, wasn’t I masking my hair’s natural beauty?

My hair was no more than 2 inches long and didn’t have a particular pattern to it so how would I style it every-day to go to my corporate job? It was time to consider a protective style. My first choice was braiding my hair and through the help of YouTube videos, I discovered yarn braids. This seemed like an affordable protective style that I could do myself. I was a bit apprehensive. Was I less natural if I wore fake hair (in this case yarn)? How would I explain to my non-black colleagues at work how my hair went from 2 inches to 10 inches overnight?

“Are you living your life for you or for other people?” my other natural friend asked me. She was right; it was time to live my life for me. I defined who I was and wasn’t and I didn’t have to answer to anyone except for myself. If anyone has a problem with my hair or the terms of my being natural, that is none of my business. After coming to this realization, I can truly say that I am free!"

- Diva Martine

GUEST DIVA: Tale of Diva Martine's Big Chop!

Hi There!
Today I am proud to introduce Diva Martine, a friend and colleague of mine who is also new to being natural.  If I recall correctly Martine did her big chop a month or so after me.  I was so happy that yet another friend had decided to make the commitment to big chop and grow natural healthy hair! Martine is absolutely beautiful however when she strolled into the office after her big chop she looked amazingly stunning. There was a glow about her that beamed with confidence and to be honest...FREEDOM! Sit back and enjoy today's tale...

Tale of Diva Martine's Big Chop by Diva Martine

I have to admit that my experience with going "au-natural" was an emotional roller-coaster. The events that led up to my big-chop were dramatic.

I was addicted to the weave like no one's business. Had it not been for the constant itch under the weave that only worsened in the summer months, I would have rocked my luxurious, store-bought locks forever. I even learned to weave my own hair. But with the recession, I needed a cheaper alternative which was a little easier to maintain. Like a total addict, I sunk deeper into my Remy obsession and discovered lace-fronts. "This is it!" I told myself as I hit the 'purchase' button for my first $400 lace front wig. It seemed simple enough: put some glue on my forehead, place the wig on and voila! In hindsight, I should have tested this theory before my trip to Paris. My lace front seemed to have a mind of its own and it did everything possible to run away from me while in Paris. The glue didn't help, it just ended up peeling the skin on my temples. Did I learn? Not at all. I went back to weaves---anything in order to keep from seeing and dealing with my own hair. Needless to say, my hair started to fall out.

Like most sistahs I ran to my beautician and begged her to save me and my hair. My beautician—let’s call her Myra---seemed a bit irked that I had conveniently dropped off the face of the earth for three years and all of a sudden I needed her. But Myra did her magic and used glue to put in pieces where I had little to no hair. BIG MISTAKE! My hair continued to break and at this point I was practically bald. So I did what any rational minded person would do. I ran to another salon and this time, the stylist cut all my hair down to about 1/2 inch and plopped some relaxer in it. Ahhh! I had that sleek Halle Berry look, even though it lasted about three days. Darn the heat which only supported my kinks to spring up. "Whatever, I’ll just have to go to the salon twice a week," I thought. My workdays were quite stressful because everything revolved around getting out of work on time so I could be in the stylist's chair by 6pm in order to get home by midnight. After three months of this I had enough! Work became even more demanding and I could no longer manage my compulsive salon routine. I went two weeks without going to the salon and I even decided to rebel and wash my own hair; how hard could it be? I knew that I hit rock bottom when I threw down $200 for a wig that I hadn't even tried on because I just couldn't let people at work see my nappy hair. When I got home from the wig shop and tried it on, I began to sob. I looked ridiculous. I was a joke!

I plead insanity for the actions I took thereafter. I grabbed a pair of scissors and started chopping my relaxed hair off. Before doing so, I called a girlfriend who had gone through the Big Chop weeks ago: "I’m doing it! I cannot take it anymore!"

She responded with hesitation: "Girl, are you sure? Are you sure that you’re ready?"

"Yes, I am!" I felt free with every cut.

-Diva Martine

That is all...

Hey There!  *smile*  From time to time I will bring blog posts entitled "That is all..." which is me interrupting your regularly scheduled program to share with you random natural hair tips, products, natural diva spotting’s, and more! I will conclude with "That is all" which basically means thanks for your attention, you can go back to whatever you were doing. LOL. 

PRODUCT REVIEW - Miss Jessie's Curly Pudding® and Curly Meringue®
About a month ago I walked into a hair store on my afternoon "I need to get out of the office for a few minutes" break.  I knew that I wanted to try something different but I wasn't sure what.  Was it going to be a hydrating mask, conditioner or moisturizer?  I walked up to the Miss Jessie's display and saw that they had trial sizes....Perfect! I could try to products without spending and wasting money if I didn't like it.  I purchased Miss Jessie's Curly Pudding and the Curly Meringue. 

Miss Jessie's Curly Pudding®

The curly pudding was just ok. It moisturized my hair, smelled good and gave me soft shiney curls but there was no wow factor. I could be just as satisfied if I used Shea Moisture's Organic Coconut & Hibiscus Curl Enhancing Smoothie (which is so much cheaper). So needless to say but I will not purchase that again.  Now, I know that there are some people who love and live by this.  It's not bad, I just feel that I can achieve the same look using something cheaper.

Miss Jessie's Curly Meringue®

I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE this product!  It smells amazing, gives my hair a great shine, and makes my hair soft.  I used it to two strand twist my hair and I was very pleased with the outcome.  There was close to no frizz, it was curly and bouncy....it just looked amazing.  I got so many compliments.  My hair looked great, I felt great, I was just working my greatness. LOL

 I just purchased the trial size of the Curly Buttercreme so I will be sure to let you know how that works out!

WORK IT VIOLA DAVIS!

Everyone has been buzzing about the two-time Academy Award Nominee Viola Davis' Natural Hair at the Oscars last week! Didn't she look absolutely amazing?  Her colored TWA (Tiny Weeny Afro) looked beautiful as she graced our TV screens in that stunning green Vera Wang gown. Apparently, Viola had been wearing wigs and finally took her husband's advice to wear her natural hair.  The media can be mean and cruel therefore, Viola must of had a number of doubts.  I can most definitely understand. After all, I dated natural. LOL.  Beauty is beauty regardless of if you wear natural hair, a wig, a weave, or a hat. This is the reason why I Blog and I flood my Facebook page with pictures of my natural hair styles.  I am beautiful, I was beautiful before when I was permed and weaved up and I am beautiful now when I am natural and twisted. And you best believe that I will continue to be beautiful because I define who I am, both inside and out. Mrs. Davis, thank you for showing America that natural hair is beautiful! 


That is all...

-Natural Diva

Tale of the Big Chop!

Thanks so much for stopping by to read today's blog tale. For those of you who don't know what Big Chop means let me break it down for you. Big Chop is when you cut all of your p relaxed or processed hair off only leaving your natural hair. Prior to my Big Chop I definitely relaxed my hair and enjoyed changing up my look as I saw fit.  Like many of the ladies out there I enjoy options and still do.

Pre-Natural Days

                                        

Saturday, September 24, 2011 was a beautiful and warm fall day.  My mom had come up from Philadelphia to visit me for a mother daughter weekend.  I had planned spa treatments, a visit to the hair salon, and an "early" night on the town.  Prior to her visit and actually months before I had been debating going natural.  At this point I was actually faking natural.  ooooh, I don't like how that sounds...scratch that. Let's just say that me and natural were dating. *wink* lol.  I was wearing wash and go styles and even tried twisting.

Dating Natural!

I had been discussing going natural with other natural diva's and thought to myself...just do it already!  I loved the natural coil that the new growth was making so why not.  All morning long I had been telling my mom that I was going to do the "Big Chop" that day.  I was trying to persuade her to do the same since she's going through the change.  (Those night sweats are no joke!)  She looked at me and said "If that's what you want to do....do it! But I will be opting for a perm and sharp hair cut!"  After the spa and breakfast we make our way to the hair salon.  I had spoken with my hair stylist the day before to let her know the deal.  We discussed adding color to spice it up and I agreed.  My mom went first since she opted for the perm. I think I said something like "say no to perms" and she replied "hell no!" smh. After she was washed, cut, and wrapped she sat under the dryer across from me.  I sat in my stylist's chair picking out hair color and waiting for the Big Chop to begin.  The cutting began and my mom sat across from me in HORROR! *screeching scream in the background* The look on her face read "baby why are you doing this".  I was confident in my decision and smiled back at her. An hour later I was done and totally in love with the outcome!  Ironically, my mom loved it too.  When Vanessa (my stylist) spun me around after she was done there was relief written on her face. 

1. The Day I Big Chopped.  2. Twist-Out at 5 Weeks.  3. Wash & Go.  4. Twist-Out at 4 Months

I'm not sure what she expected but for the rest of the day she kept smiling at me and telling me that " it really did look nice" and "you can pull off anything baby!"   I won't lie it was nice to hear that from her however, this is the case with anyone.  So, today's lesson is  - With confidence and complete awareness of who you are "You can pull off ANYTHING!" If you are considering the BC I recommend the following:

1. Ask yourself why you want to go natural.  Natural is not always easy.  To keep hair healthy you will need a regular regime.  I actually care for my hair so much better now than I did before. Simply because I was unaware on how to really take care of my hair.

2. Do some research and speak with other Natural Diva's that wear it well!  You'll see that there is a pride and confidence that comes with it.  



3. Plan and Preparation - A lot of ladies like options and switch up their hair A LOT. After a Big Chop there is only but so much you can do with a TWA (Tiny Winy Afro).  So plan and prepare for the next 6 months.  You can do twist-outs, finger twists and wash & goes.  Some naturals believe that hair color is damaging. As for me, do what you feel.  If you have a bad experience it's short start over. lol You can also accent with hats, scarves, headbands and my favorite BIG OLE' EARRINGS!  I love make-up so try different shades of eye shadow and lipsticks. Make sure your upper lip and eyebrows are waxed.  Like I always say "Leave no region of hair behind! Keep everything neat!" LOL!

Well that's all for today. Thanks for reading The Tales of a Diva Gone Natural - The Good, The Bad, and the oh so Fabulous! Until we meet again...

Stay Beautiful!

Nic

Welcome!

Welcome and thank you so much for visiting the "Tales of a Diva Gone Natural" Blog! My name is Nic AKA Natural Diva and I "Big Chopped" on September 24, 2011.  After much thought, I've finally given to the urge to publicly document and discuss my natural hair journey. (Which I'm really excited about!)  In addition to my journey I will have "Guest Divas" in different phases of their natural hair journey share with you their experiences.  I understand that everyone is not in the beginner stages of being natural so it's important for me to bring you all different perspectives.  I'm also super excited to bring you "Cocktails & Conversation Interviews" with fellow Natural Divas who are WORKING their natural style.  You know those Divas you see on the street and you want to stop them to say "Girl, I LOVE your hair!"?  Yes...them!  Over a cocktail or cocktails (plural on purpose) I'll  ask all of the questions we all want to know from "What are you using?" to "What is the worst Natural Hair Day you've had?".

So be sure to check back often to read the "Tales of a Diva Gone Natural - The Good, The Bad and the oh so Fabulous!"

Stay Beautiful,
Nic

Big Chopped: 9/24/11

Hair Type:  4A